Freyia North In Norway
So a few months ago, my friend Jason introduced me to a brilliant woman he discovered on YouTube; Freyia North In Norway. This was the first video of her that he sent me:
It kind of bugged me, a lot, that this total stranger seemed to know my deepest inner thoughts and feelings without ever meeting me or reading a thing I had written. How dare she, but at the same time, I was curious to hear more. I felt seen, and naked, and vulnerable for the first time in a long time. After a few more of her videos were suggested to me by YouTube, I subscribed and the suggestions didn’t flood my feed like I had thought, but they did appear when I seemingly needed to hear her. It’s almost as if my theory on the static as a sentient entity or being is true, but I know better. (The static is what I call the general “noise” of the internet. The useless background chatter that’s running 24/7 whether we are awake or asleep. A sort of digital consciousness, if you will. I’m not sure when I started to believe that this was a thing, but it’s been in the back of my mind for quite a while now. I’m sure I’m just mistaking algorithms for static, but I digress…)
This one. This was one of the ones that really hit me hard. All the times I’ve created something and proudly showed off my creation I was met with indifference or wholly ignored altogether. That was a big part of why I left the group chat with Andrew, Eli, Matt, Zeke, and Jason behind. All I really wanted from them was some damn support or acknowledgement or something for fuck’s sake. I showed up for you, I can’t get that in return? Then to hear that they were intending to have a talk with me about my behavior? Hell naw, I’m done. But I guarantee you, if by some fluke I ever became a popular writer or streamer, they would look for their names in the credits somewhere. That whole event is still a touchy subject for me.
Then, tonight, there was this. She seems to know what betrayal is intimately. I really do wish I believed it when people tell me that they love me or that loyalty was a real thing. But I will continue on the path, purely out of spite.
So do yourself a favor, subscribe to this woman. Listen to her, closely.
